Sally’s plan to banish Britain’s baggy bums
Britain is in danger of becoming a nation of jeans jesters – with men wearing denims that are beyond a joke, according to Sally Allen of Wizard Jeans.
Spot checks in 14 major towns across the country suggest that, on average, one-in-three men are wearing jeans with baggy bums, sagging crotches and concertina ankles or, alternatively, jeans that are too short, worn out or sliding down over the buttocks in the ultimate style offence - ‘builders bum’.
So Wizard Jeans have launched a campaign to persuade men to hang up their 'baggy bum' jeans in favour of a tighter, neater fit around the rear, and Sally hopes to enlist the aid of wives and girlfriends in helping her to banish baggy bums.
Sally says that British men seemed to be alone in Europe in demonstrating how not to wear jeans. “It’s as if they are trying their best to look their worst while their counterparts in France, Germany, Italy, Spain and Portugal clearly make an effort to look great. You won’t see a sagging crotch or a builders’ bum in most other parts of Europe.”
The Wizard Jeans list of jeans jokes are:-
- Baggy Bum – jeans too large with excess fabric hanging from the rear.
- Sagging Crotch – jeans too large, worn too low, excess fabric hanging from front.
- Builders’ Bum – waist too large, sliding down over rear.
- Concertina Ankles – jeans too long.
- Half Mast – jeans too short.
- Scruffy – jeans on their last legs, worn out at knees, frayed bottoms.
See cartoon sketches to the right.
“We could all use a little help to look our best in jeans,” says Sally, “which is why we’ve designed and produced jeans which help flatten the stomach and lift the rear while slimming-down the overall silhouette.”
To kick-off the campaign, she's calling for photographic evidence of some of the worst 'baggy bum' offenders, whose pictures will be featured in an on-line Rogues Gallery of sagging bottoms and dropped crotches. Sally is also looking for you to name and shame those male celebrities who have also fallen victim to the ‘baggy bum’.
"It's probably not entirely their fault," says Sally. "Many men simply don't bother to check out their rear-view in the mirror and so remain blissfully unaware of just how unsightly they sometimes look. If we can show them the error of their ways, we may be able to persuade them to smarten-up with jeans that actually fit."
Sally, who heads the Wizard Jeans organisation, believes the problem gets worse as men grow older. "Boys may have an excuse for their sagging rears because they believe they are making a fashion statement – albeit a very ill-advised one. But it's bad news when men in their 20's and 30's are seen with baggy bums and a complete disaster for any man over 40."
Sally has specially designed a pair of Wizard men's jeans with a flattering cut to provide a well-toned and sex-looking bottom for any man. "Our jeans for men are tailored to a shape which shows off their bottoms in the most flattering way possible, while still being extremely comfortable," she says. And to prove the point, her 'Banish the Baggy Bum' campaign, plans to hand-out a pair of bottom-flattering jeans to the men featured in the worst ten photographs received before Christmas.
Wives, girlfriends, mothers and sisters are invited to e-mail 'baggy bum' pictures of the men in their lives to sally@wizardjeans.com.
The offenders
We will be publishing our 'Rogues Gallery' of offenders here on the website so please send your pictures to sally@wizardjeans.com to see them featured here.
Also please send us your nominations for the ‘Male Celebrity Baggy Bum’ by filling out the form.
To the right is our first celebrity offender in the baggy bum 'Rogues Gallery', Simon Cowell and below a selection of cartoons to give you a chuckle.
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